The past months has allowed me to evolve from being a writer to a project manager/virtual assistant. As a matter of fact, I have not taken a writing job since January this year. It is certainly not because I do not love writing anymore, but it was more because the demand in the job market has geared towards other types of job. To find a writing job on the niches I love is really agonizing. Other than this, writers from all over the world (even some from the US) are slashing down their fees just to be competitive. For this reason, I simply stopped writing.
Work has always been a challenge. The ups and downs would have made regular people cringed and give up. My mom has been telling me for a hundredth time to stop working on the Internet and go find myself a regular and more consistent employment. Or, I can always go back to my cooking business — which causes me to cringe every time I think back on those days making endless steam buns and butterscotch. Ugh.
Have I really lost the love for writing? Where is the passion and the creativity that usually flows whenever I find myself starting to blog? What is the future of my career as a freelancer? How will I survive when I am not even sure what am I doing, or what I should do next?
A friend reminded me the other day that I should spend time each day to write whatever thoughts/topics that come to my mind. This is the best way to get the creative juices flowing again. I guess, it was a wake-up call that I needed. Don’t get me wrong. I love being a project manager and virtual assistant. In fact, I can do this type of job every day, every week. There are challenges and learning experiences that seem to keep me on my toes all the time. But writing is different.
Writing is a way for me to open my soul to something or someone beyond. It is different from talking to a friend or a family member, wherein you have the tendency to think before you say things for fear of being judged, or gaining approval. Writing is baring yourself without fear of both. It is just a matter between you, your thoughts, and your keyboard. Whether people reading your thoughts approve or not, it doesn’t matter. The important point is being able to get your thoughts across and the feeling of release giving you comfort.
Where is the love for writing? It is buried deep in my heart. With all the challenges the past months have brought, I can dig deep in my heart and unleash it. It is the love for writing that will once again save me from all this confusion and frustrations.